Update: I'm invited to a surprise birthday party for Paul Cook, a colleague I respect who will turn forty and doesn't like surprises. It's a potluck, gifts are not required and I understand we will roast him. I thought there's nothing more appropriate than to give him a gag gift.

Between you and I, Paul had an issue with a certain speaker who was full of herself when she demonstrated a prop. I shopped at a thrift store to find a similar prop to surprise him with. I wrote the card in her voice as if coming from her. He'll eventually catch on, but I just wanted to see the reaction on his face as he reads the card out loud. It will be a birthday he will never forget.

Feature Article: Victimhood Awareness

Resource: As a Man Thinketh

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Doritos Junior...

At the supermarket I noticed my favorite Doritos Salsa Verde returned to the lower retail price. It weighed 12.5 ounces. I swore the last time I bought it months ago, it was a heavier 14 ounces. Then I thought: What a clever, skillful, and almost sneaky way for the manufacturer to make more profits by reducing the size.

But they're not alone...

Even Jack in the Box's Jumbo Jack beef patty looks like it went on a diet by about half the size it was just three years ago. Once you unwrap the sandwich you need a search party to locate the beef. I can see Clara Peller asking, "Where's the beef?"

Now with Doritos, they didn't stop there. They also shrank the size of their potato chip bag so the bag feels fuller. This technique psychologically makes you believe you have a lot left in the bag.

There may be a sliver lining to this almost deceptive marketing scheme by the big companies. Hopefully, consumers will consume a lot less junk into their bodies. Which will be better for their health.

But hypothetically, the big companies are banking that consumers will get hungry sooner. And instead of buying two Big Macs like before, they will now opt for three. It's a win-win situation for the company.

Where does this leave us?

Hopefully this will cause consumers to shop with more care and compare prices with the amount. And hopefully, they will stay on top of big companies by keeping informed through consumer-oriented websites like Mouse Print.

Victimhood Awareness

Dear Associate,

Something didn't quite gel. Barbara sent mixed signals. I couldn't put my finger on it right away. She hastily accepted the decision, giving off a sigh of relief, instead of disbelief that she didn't qualify. She went beyond the time limit by a mere second.

Barbara had finished her presentation demonstrating the didgeridoo. That's a hollow wooden wind instrument from the Aboriginal tribes of Australia. It was a gift from a good friend. And because she went past her allotted time, she was immediately disqualified.

Barbara gave a rehearsed smile and nodded her head in agreement. She was satisfied with the ruling. Almost as if she was signaling to the audience she has risen above this trite competition.

I didn't buy it...

Because she was holding on to victimhood — one of the greatest enemies of personal success you will ever face. Barbara was so scared of success she found a reason, excuse, or an out for not coming in first. And then gloated over the extra attention she got for coming so close, but just missing the mark.

In her own words she wrote, "In a way, the time issue brought out people's positive reactions to my speech even more strongly than if I had finished on time and gotten the best speaker award. Everyone loves an underdog, and in a sense, I feel that people reacted to me with more endearment. I was really touched by the positive feedback and had a blast giving the speech."

Barbara wanted to bathe in the love, sympathy and pity so badly she created an underdog image of herself. And to continue receiving this kind of affection she must continue being the underdog. Even if that means she has to sabotage herself. Because coming in first or winning the prize would reduce the love she desperately craves.

She's on a vicious victimhood cycle.

And many well-meaning people you know are on this same cycle today. They believe they're only good enough for a certain level of success, income or happiness. Or that Mr. or Mrs. Right doesn't exist because of a string of haphazard, merry-go-round relationships. And then accepting their current circumstances.

After a few past failures, negative experiences or getting burned by somebody they trusted — they decided to quit. Settle in a comfort zone. And then commiserate with those who tried climbing to the top but got knocked down also.

If you are a serious student of success you must recognize and eliminate this cycle that can damage your entire well being and leave you stuck. Immobile. Existing day-to-day but not living your dreams.

Victimhood is one of the most harmful, anti-success beliefs you can harbor. It deceives you into thinking you are on the right track. When in reality you are on a safe, neutral track. And it robs you of the joy you could have had, had you reached your end goal.

But you can switch tracks...

You possess the power to move from victim to victor. But it requires some exercise. Just as a muscle turns flabby when not used, you can work on your victor muscle.

Avoiding damaging influences like television and negative friends will protect your mind from faulty programming. Reading self-help books, listening to CDs and attending seminars will supercharge your mind with appropriate content. And modeling those who are successful will keep you on the success track.

I'd like to see Barbara get out of her safe, neutral track. But as long as she believes she's on the success track, she won't do anything to change it. It has to begin with her. And it has to begin in her mind.

Warm regards,

"People are anxious to improve their circumstances, but are unwilling to improve themselves; they therefore remain bound." (Excerpted from As a Man Thinketh.) James Allen rocks society's core beliefs proclaiming the master planner in your life is you. You also attract good and bad circumstances from the thoughts you give precedence to. This is required reading for those on the path to success.